Barbara Rubel Releases New Edition of Suicide Loss Self-Help Book

Griefwork Center, Inc. and Barbara Rubel announce the publication of the third revised updated edition of But I Didn’t Say Goodbye: Helping Families After a Suicide. Written from the perspective of eleven-year-old Alex, the book tells the story of a boy and his family as they are rocked by suicide and reeling from the aftermath. Through Alex’s eyes, the reader will see the transformation of a family’s thoughts and feelings after a suicide.

New to the third edition, the end of each chapter sees Alex, now twenty-one, reflecting on how his father’s death by suicide has changed his life, wounding him but also helping him and his family to grow. Each chapter is accompanied by follow-up questions to explore in counseling sessions, support groups, or at home. The revised edition is an evidence-informed and contemporary treatment of a devastating form of loss that uses the artistic device of a hypothetical case study to render loss in human terms.

Part 1 of the book offers an understanding of suicide postvention, complicated grief, and mourning. Chapters have been substantially updated, based on mourning models and the latest research. The chapters in Part 2 build upon one another sequentially, from the day of the suicide to the anniversary of the death.

Barbara Rubel, a board-certified expert in traumatic stress and a diplomate with the American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress, has translated modern academic theories of grieving into a readable story for anyone bereaved by suicide. Through the story, the reader will understand what losing someone to suicide might be like for a family, how to create meaning in the loss, and how to experience personal growth. This self-help book was revised to provide guidance and education for clinicians, such as mental health providers, social workers, psychologists, school counselors, and case managers, as well as families and other suicide loss survivors.

As a keynote speaker and trainer, Barbara Rubel focuses on building resilience and mitigating the impact of vicarious trauma after a suicide, pandemic, or traumatic loss. Her programs focus on educating professionals about traumatic bereavement informed care and building personal resilience in professionals. Barbara is a champion for professional well-being, and she brings a deep understanding of thanatology and personal resilience to her work. With refreshing clarity and humor, her speaking engagements are designed to give human service professionals practical strategies that can be implemented immediately.

Barbara Rubel of Griefwork Center, Inc. is a keynote speaker and author who delivers programs to human service professionals to foster resilience and lessen the impact of job burnout, secondary traumatic stress, compassion fatigue, and vicarious trauma. Barbara’s list of clients spans more than five hundred corporations, conferences, universities, and government agencies. She is a consultant with the U.S. Department of Justice as well as the Office for Victims of Crime Training and Technical Assistance Center (OVCTTAC), whose training curriculum she co-wrote.


For more information about the book release, visit the Griefwork Center, Inc. website at Barbara Rubel can be reached by email at